Saturday, October 30, 2010

Friday, August 20, 2010

PETUA IMAM SHAFIE

PETUA IMAM SYAFIE

4 PERKARA UNTUK SIHAT

Empat perkara menguatkan badan

1. Makan daging

2. Memakai haruman

3. Kerap mandi

4. Berpakaian dari kapas


Empat perkara melemahkan badan

1. Banyak berkelamin (bersetubuh)

2. Selalu cemas

3. Banyak minum air ketika makan

4. Banyak makan bahan yang masam


Empat perkara menajamkan
Mata
1. Duduk mengadap kiblat

2. Bercelak sebelum tidur

3. Memandang yang hijau

4. Berpakaian bersih


Empat perkara merosakkan
Mata
1. Memandang najis

2. Melihat orang dibunuh

3. Melihat kemaluan

4. Membelakangi kiblat


Empat perkara menajamkan fikiran

1. Tidak banyak berbual kosong

2. Rajin bersugi (gosok gigi)

3.. Bercakap dengan orang soleh

4. Bergaul dengan para ulama


4 CARA TIDUR


1. TIDUR PARA NABI

Tidur terlentang sambil berfikir tentang kejadian langit
Dan
Bumi.


2. TIDUR PARA ULAMA' & AHLI IBADAH

Miring ke sebelah kanan untuk memudahkan terjaga untuk solat

Malam.


3. TIDUR PARA RAJA YANG HALOBA

Miring ke sebelah kiri untuk mencernakan makanan yang banyak

Dimakan.


4. TIDUR SYAITAN

Menelungkup/tiarap seperti tidurnya ahli neraka.


SEORANG DOKTOR NEUROLOGI MENEMUI KEAJAIBAN ALLAH ........


Assalam Mu'alaikum Wbrth! Dan Salam Sejahtera! Sahabat2 semua yang Islam Dan juga yang Bukan Islam... Bacalah E mail ini dari sahabat yg menetap di US:
'Seorang doktor di Amerika Syarikat telah memeluk Islam kerana beberapa keajaiban yang ditemuinya dalam penyelidikannya. Dia amat kagum dengan penemuan tersebut, sehingga tidak dapat diterima oleh akal fikiran.
Dia adalah seorang Doktor Neurologi .

Setelah memeluk Islam, dia amat yakin akan perubatan secara Islam Dan dengan itu telah membuka sebuah klinik yang bertemakan 'Perubatan Melalui Al-Qur'an' ...
Kajian perubatan melalui Al-Qur'an membuatkan ubat-ubatannya berteraskan apa yang terdapat di dalam Al-Qur'an. Di antara kaedah-kaedah yang digunakan termasuklah berpuasa, madu lebah, biji hitam (black seed) Dan sebagainy a.
Apabila ditanya bagaimana dia tertarik untuk memeluk Islam,

Maka doktor tersebut memberitahu bahawa semasa beliau melakukan kajian urat saraf, terdapat beberapa urat saraf di dalam otak manusia yang tidak dimasuki oleh darah . Padahal setiap inci otak manusia memerlukan darah yang cukup untuk berfungsi secara normal.
Setelah membuat kajian yang memakan masa, akhirnya beliau mendapati Bahawa darah tidak akan memasuki urat saraf di dalam otak manusia melainkan pada ketika seseorang itu sedang sujud semasa mengerjakan Sembahyang!!!
Urat tersebut memerlukan darah hanya untuk Beberapa sukatan yang tertentu sahaja. Ini bermaksud bahawa darah hanya akan memasuki urat tersebut mengikut kadar sembahyang waktu yang diwajibkan oleh Islam.......Begitulah keagungan ciptaan Allah!!!

Tidak menunaikan sembahyang , akan otaknya tidak Akan dapat menerima darah yang secukupnya untuk berfungsi secara normal!!!

Oleh yang demikian, kejadian manusia ini sebenarnya adalah untuk menganuti agama Islam 'sepenuhnya' kerana sifat fitrah kejadiannya memang telah dikaitkan oleh Allah dengan agama-Nya yang indah ini.'



How to convince people effectively

The ability make others believe what you believe is important for success in many fields. There is often a fine line between convincing somebody your views are valid and annoying them. In this article we’ll look at some of the techniques you can use if you want to convince another individual to believe what you believe.

Steps

  • Do the homework. Make sure you understand your own viewpoint. If you are going to try to convince somebody that the Eiffel Tower is taller than the Statue of Liberty, find out the facts first, don’t make assumptions.
  • Learn the field. For certain areas you will need to know more than just the facts, as some subjects are subjective. For example, if you wanted to convince somebody that the Statue of Liberty was prettier than the Eiffel Tower you will need to know enough about architecture and aesthetics to argue about that subject, as well as the facts, like how tall they are. If you are selling something, like a car, you will need to know all there is to know about the car you are selling. Likewise, you will need to know all about the other cars that are in competition with your vehicle.
  • Engage the person politely. Maintain eye contact where possible, but don’t be annoying about it.
  • Establish mutual respect. You will never convince anybody of anything if they believe you do not respect them, so show the person you respect them and be good enough to gain their respect.
  • Gain trust. To convince people of most things you will need their trust. They don’t have to trust you as a person, but they do need to trust that what you are saying makes sense, that you know your “stuff”. The best way to do this is to do your homework and fieldwork, that way you know a lot about the subject.
  • Listen carefully to what your debate partner has to say. Respond thoughtfully to their point of view.
  • When you can, back up what you say with real facts. Lying will only convince somebody until they find out about the lie, then you will never be able to convince them of anything again.
  • Be willing to be convinced. Sometimes accepting one point from the other person and showing that you can change your mind when you are wrong will help them to be the same, and change their mind about the subject you care about.
  • Practice active listening. Active listening helps you control a conversation and keeps it on track. Active listening techniques include:
    • Non-verbal feedback. Nodding your head as the other talks etc.
    • Paraphrase what the other person has said to make sure you understand it.
  • Make sure you understand the other person’s objections and respond to them in an intelligent manner.
  • Keep vigilant about your belief, but always respectful of the beliefs of others. Explain why your belief is important to you.
  • Understand the other person’s motivations. If you know what another person wants, you are more likely to be able to give it to them.
  • Rephrase your beliefs in a way that the other person is better able to understand.
  • Follow up. Ask questions to make sure the other person understands their new views completely.

Tips

  • To hold the eye of a crowd select individuals in the crowd and hold their eyes on-and-off through your presentation.
  • Never lose your cool. Nothing lacks conviction more than a raving idiot.
  • Always be friendly and respectful even if the other person does not change their mind.
  • Beliefs fade. You may think you have changed somebodies mind but find that in a day or two, perhaps a week, they are right back to where they were before.
  • Buy and read some books on sales techniques.
By :Karmic Mantra

Thursday, May 27, 2010

health chart from fruits

Share this Chart with everyone you care

apples

Protects your heart

prevents constipation

Blocks diarrhea

Improves lung capacity

Cushions joints

apricots

Combats cancer

Controls blood pressure

Saves your eyesight

Shields against Alzheimer's

Slows aging process

artichokes

Aids digestion

Lowers cholesterol

Protects your heart

Stabilizes blood sugar

Guards against liver disease

avocados

Battles diabetes

Lowers cholesterol

Helps stops strokes

Controls blood pressure

Smoothes skin

bananas

Protects your heart

Quiets a cough

Strengthens bones

Controls blood pressure

Blocks diarrhea

beans

Prevents constipation

Helps hemorrhoids

Lowers cholesterol

Combats cancer

Stabilizes blood sugar

beets

Controls blood pressure

Combats cancer

Strengthens bones

Protects your heart

Aids weight loss

blueberries

Combats cancer

Protects your heart

Stabilizes blood sugar

Boosts memory

Prevents constipation

broccoli

Strengthens bones

Saves eyesight

Combats cancer

Protects your heart

Controls blood pressure

cabbage

Combats cancer

Prevents constipation

Promotes weight loss

Protects your heart

Helps hemorrhoids

cantaloupe

Saves eyesight

Controls blood pressure

Lowers cholesterol

Combats cancer

Supports immune system

carrots

Saves eyesight

Protects your heart

Prevents constipation

Combats cancer

Promotes weight loss

cauliflower

Protects against Prostate Cancer

Combats Breast Cancer

Strengthens bones

Banishes bruises

Guards against heart disease

cherries

Protects your heart

Combats Cancer

Ends insomnia

Slows aging process

Shields against Alzheimer's

chestnuts

Promotes weight loss

Protects your heart

Lowers cholesterol

Combats Cancer

Controls blood pressure

chili peppers

Aids digestion

Soothes sore throat

Clears sinuses

Combats Cancer

Boosts immune system

figs

Promotes weight loss

Helps stops strokes

Lowers cholesterol

Combats Cancer

Controls blood pressure

fish

Protects your heart

Boosts memory

Protects your heart

Combats Cancer

Supports immune system

flax

Aids digestion

Battles diabetes

Protects your heart

Improves mental health

Boosts immune system

garlic

Lowers cholesterol

Controls blood pressure

Combats cancer

kills bacteria

Fights fungus

grapefruit

Protects against heart attacks

Promotes Weight loss

Helps stops strokes

Combats Prostate Cancer

Lowers cholesterol

grapes

saves eyesight

Conquers kidney stones

Combats cancer

Enhances blood flow

Protects your heart

green tea

Combats cancer

Protects your heart

Helps stops strokes

Promotes Weight loss

Kills bacteria

honey

Heals wounds

Aids digestion

Guards against ulcers

Increases energy

Fights allergies

lemons

Combats cancer

Protects your heart

Controls blood pressure

Smoothes skin

Stops scurvy

limes

Combats cancer

Protects your heart

Controls blood pressure

Smoothes skin

Stops scurvy

mangoes

Combats cancer

Boosts memory

Regulates thyroid

aids digestion

Shields against Alzheimer's

mushrooms

Controls blood pressure

Lowers cholesterol

Kills bacteria

Combats cancer

Strengthens bones

oats

Lowers cholesterol

Combats cancer

Battles diabetes

prevents constipation

Smoothes skin

olive oil

Protects your heart

Promotes Weight loss

Combats cancer

Battles diabetes

Smoothes skin

onions

Reduce risk of heart attack

Combats cancer

Kills bacteria

Lowers cholesterol

Fights fungus

oranges

Supports immune systems

Combats cancer

Protects your heart

Straightens respiration


peaches

prevents constipation

Combats cancer

Helps stops strokes

aids digestion

Helps hemorrhoids

peanuts

Protects against heart disease

Promotes Weight loss

Combats Prostate Cancer

Lowers cholesterol

Aggravates
diverticulitis

pineapple

Strengthens bones

Relieves colds

Aids digestion

Dissolves warts

Blocks diarrhea

prunes

Slows aging process

prevents constipation

boosts memory

Lowers cholesterol

Protects against heart disease

rice

Protects your heart

Battles diabetes

Conquers kidney stones

Combats cancer

Helps stops strokes

strawberries

Combats cancer

Protects your heart

boosts memory

Calms stress


sweet potatoes

Saves your eyesight

Lifts mood

Combats cancer

Strengthens bones


tomatoes

Protects prostate

Combats cancer

Lowers cholesterol

Protects your heart


walnuts

Lowers cholesterol

Combats cancer

boosts memory

Lifts mood

Protects against heart disease

water

Promotes Weight loss

Combats cancer

Conquers kidney stones

Smoothes skin


watermelon

Protects prostate

Promotes Weight loss

Lowers cholesterol

Helps stops strokes

Controls blood pressure

wheat germ

Combats Colon Cancer

prevents constipation

Lowers cholesterol

Helps stops strokes

improves digestion

wheat bran

Combats Colon Cancer

prevents constipation

Lowers cholesterol

Helps stops strokes

improves digestion

yogurt

Guards against ulcers

Strengthens bones

Lowers cholesterol

Supports immune systems

Aids digestion

Monday, April 19, 2010

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Important of drinking water.

Water is an important structural component of skin cartilage, tissues and organs. For human beings, every part of the body is dependent on water. Our body comprises about 75% water: the brain has 85%, blood is 90%, muscles are 75%, kidney is 82% and bones are 22% water. The functions of our glands and organs will eventually deteriorate if they are not nourished with good, clean water.
The average adult loses about 2.5 litres water daily through perspiration, breathing and elimination. Symptoms of the body's deterioration begins to appear when the body loses 5% of its total water volume. In a healthy adult, this is seen as fatigue and general discomfort, whereas for an infant, it can be dehydrating. In an elderly person, a 5% water loss causes the body chemistry to become abnormal, especially if the percentage of electrolytes is overbalanced with sodium.One can usually see symptoms of aging, such as wrinkles, lethargy and even disorientation. Continuous water loss over time will speed up aging as well as increase risks of diseases.
If your body is not sufficiently hydrated, the cells will draw water from your bloodstream, which will make your heart work harder. At the same time, the kidneys cannot purify blood effectively. When this happens, some of the kidney's workload is passed on to the liver and other organs, which may cause them to be severely stressed. Additionally, you may develop a number of minor health conditions such as constipation, dry and itchy skin, acne, nosebleeds, urinary tract infection, coughs, sneezing, sinus pressure, and headaches.

Pesan Dr.Fazilah Kamsah.

Dato' Dr. Fazilah Kamsah pernah berkata..... .

" setiap pagi sedekahkan al-fatihah kepada kedua ibu bapamu ( tak kira masih hidup @ telah tiada )".......... nescaya pintu rezekimu akan terbuka buat kamu...

Berdasarkan Hadith Nabi :


"Tidak akan terputus rezeki seseorang selagi dia tidak meninggalkan doa kepada kedua orang tua nya dalam sehari"


Huraian hadith:
- jangan sesekali meninggalkan doa kepada kedua ibubapa (baik yang hidup mahupun yang sudah tiada )
- Allah akan memurahkan rezeki kepada mereka yang tidak putus berdoa kepada kedua ibu bapa (walaupun ada ibu bapa yang leka, doakan agar mereka berubah)
- Ingatlah bahawa keredhaan ibu bapa adalah keredhaan Allah
- Semasa berdoa, berdoalah dengan bersungguh2. ...tadah tangan dan bayangkan wajah kedua orang tua kita , termasuk guru2 kita dan mereka yang banyak menolong kita (berdoa perlu benar2 bersungguh2)
- Mereka yang lupa berdoa kepada kedua orang tua, akan disempitkan rezeki oleh Allah

Kesimpulannya:
- Bagi yang berniaga, tak perlu ada ilmu pelaris..... . Cuma jangan lupa doakan ibu bapa kita setiap hari
- Rezeki bukan sahaja berupa wang ringgit, tetapi segala nikmat yang kita dapat dari Allah (e.g. makan, kesihatan, kasih sayang, ilmu dsb nya..) InsyaAllah, Berusaha dan bertawakal.. ...insyallah , rezeki itu bukan kerana ada sijil SPM, (kata Azmil Mustapha)... ..Mari kita cuba
.Allahhuakhbar. ..

Insya Allah
Allahu Akbar !

Monday, February 15, 2010

HOW TO SPEAK WELL AND CONFIDENTS.

Are you very shy when it comes to new surroundings, such as starting a new class or moving to a new area? Sometimes, it is necessary to overcome your shyness and speak confidently. By doing this, it can help you not only to share your ideas properly to others, but also to learn communicating with others. Here are a few steps to consider when speaking with confidence.

Steps

  1. Learn how to have conversations with people. Your ideas or opinions may not always be accepted by others, but this is nothing unusual. Open your mouth, express your beliefs! This will improve your courage.
  2. Don’t be afraid and speak loudly. If you speak in a low voice, not only will others not be able to hear what you say, but you will also portray a submissive demeanor, which suggests the opposite of a confident one.
  3. Make eye contact when you speak. For one thing, it is polite for others. Also, eye contact will help others to listen to your thinking carefully.
  4. Praise yourself everyday! This will promote your own confidence, which is important when you speak. With more confidence, people will take your thinking more seriously.

Tips

  • Don’t be nervous when you make mistakes. Human error is far from being a new concept — nobody is perfect! It is normal for everyone to make mistakes. Just calm down and keep speaking bravely.
  • Try and try again! This may be difficult for a shy person at first, but you need to force yourself to speak, and not seclude your thoughts. If you have some ideas, then try to speak out! Don’t just keep them in your head.
  • If you have self confidence issues, try to think that you are the only one who has sound knowledge about the topic. Then go ahead and impart your knowledge to the audience in an effective way.
  • Remember that there is a fine line between confidence and arrogance. Don’t portray an exaggerated amount of confidence, or you will come off as arrogant, believing that your ideas are better than the ideas of everyone else.

how to start conversation.

Whether you are a host or a guest, there are many social situations that will call for interaction, even when you are stumped for some way to get it going. For example, you might want to help a friend’s new “significant other” feel comfortable. Or, you might see a stranger across a crowded room, and realize that this is your only chance to impress Mr. or Ms. Wonderful. Then, you realize that you’re not sure what to say.

  1. Start with a “hello,” and simply tell the new person your name then ask them theirs. Offer your hand to shake, upon his/her responding to you. (If you go to other countries, greet the person in tune with the particular culture). If you already know the person, skip this step and proceed to step.
  2. Look around. See if there is anything worth pointing out. Sure, talking about the weather is a cliche, but if there’s something unusual about it–bam!–you’ve got a great topic of conversation.
  3. Offer a compliment. Don’t lie and say you love someone’s hair when you think it’s revolting, but if you like his or her shoes, or a handbag, say so. A sincere compliment is a wonderful way to get someone to warm up to you. But be careful not to say something so personal that you scare the person off or make him or her feel uncomfortable. It is best not to compliment a person’s looks or body.
  4. Ask questions! Most people love to talk about themselves — get them going. “What classes are you taking this year?” “Have you seen (Insert-Something-Here)? What did you think of it?” Again, keep the questions light and not invasive. Do not ask too many questions if he or she is not responsive to them.
  5. Jump on any conversation-starters he or she might offer; take something he or she has said and run with it. Agree, disagree, ask a question about it, or offer an opinion, just don’t let it go by without notice.
  6. Look your newfound friend in the eye, it engenders trust (but don’t stare). Also, use the person’s name a time or two during the conversation; it will help you remember the name, and will draw the person’s attention to what you are talking about.
  7. Don’t forget to smile and have fun with your conversation!

Tips

  • Just relax. Chances are that whatever small-talk you’re making isn’t going to stick out in anyone’s mind a few months from now. Just say whatever comes into your head, so long as it’s not offensive or really weird. (Unless, of course, the person you’re attempting to converse with is into weird stuff.)
  • Remember, if you think of something in your head while you’re talking, it’s probably related.
  • It will help if you watch some TV, listen to radio shows, and/or read a lot — newspapers, magazines, and/or books. You need to have some idea of what is going on in the world. Also remember and plan to share anything you like, think is funny, or find intriguing. This is building up your own library of things that might be helpful to another person during a conversation someday. It will be amazing how you thread these interesting things when you least expect it, and make conversation an adventure instead of a dreadful task. If you take it to the next step and say things that you want the person to think of as adding value, and keep to yourself things that the person might not, you are actually honing your own personality to be appealing to the other person, and what is a greater act of kindness than that.
  • If you are shy, it will be helpful to have thought about a topic or two that you could talk about.
  • Follow the lead that your listener is expressing. If he or she appears interested, then continue. If he or she is looking at a clock or watch, or worse, looking for an escape strategy, then you have been going on for too long.
  • Interesting and funny quotes or facts can lighten things up, and make way for things to talk about. You could also use a set of conversation starter question cards for inspiration.
  • If talking over the phone, keep the person involved in the conversation at all costs. If you can’t come up with a good topic, try the “questions” game. Just keep asking them questions; random questions work just fine as long as they are appropriate. This technique can save a phone conversation. The questions should be open ended questions that do not require a yes or no answer. For example “How do you know the hosts?” This way you can ask questions about what they just said or follow up with how you know the hosts (for example) instead of acting as if the conversation is an interrogation.
  • Half of an effective conversation is the way you non-verbally communicate, and not necessarily what you say. Practice better non-verbal skills that are friendly and confident.
  • Read newspapers and magazines to increase your knowledge so you can have more interesting things to talk about

10 DEADLY SIN OF NEGATIVE THINKING.

The way to overcome negative thoughts and destructive emotions is to develop opposing, positive emotions that are stronger and more powerful.” – Dalai Lama

Life could be so much better for many people, if they would just spot their negative thinking habits and replace them with positive ones.

Negative thinking, in all its many-splendored forms, has a way of creeping into conversations and our thinking without our noticing them. The key to success, in my humble opinion, is learning to spot these thoughts and squash them like little bugs. Then replace them with positive ones. You’ll notice a huge difference in everything you do.

Let’s take a look at 10 common ways that negative thinking emerges — get good at spotting these patterns, and practice replacing them with positive thinking patterns. It has made all the difference in the world for me.

10 Deadly Sins of Negative Thinking

1. I will be happy once I have _____ (or once I earn X).

Problem: If you think you can’t be happy until you reach a certain point, or until you reach a certain income, or have a certain type of house or car or computer setup, you’ll never be happy. That elusive goal is always just out of reach. Once we reach those goals, we are not satisfied — we want more.

Solution: Learn to be happy with what you have, where you are, and who you are, right at this moment. Happiness doesn’t have to be some state that we want to get to eventually — it can be found right now. Learn to count your blessings, and see the positive in your situation. This might sound simplistic, but it works.
2. I wish I were as ____ as (a celebrity, friend, co-worker).

Problem: We’ll never be as pretty, as talented, as rich, as sculpted, as cool, as everyone else. There will always be someone better, if you look hard enough. Therefore, if we compare ourselves to others like this, we will always pale, and will always fail, and will always feel bad about ourselves. This is no way to be happy.

Solution: Stop comparing yourself to others, and look instead at yourself — what are your strengths, your accomplishments, your successes, however small? What do you love about yourself? Learn to love who you are, right now, not who you want to become. There is good in each of us, love in each of us, and a wonderful human spirit in every one of us.

3. Seeing others becoming successful makes me jealous and resentful.

Problem: First, this assumes that only a small number of people can be successful. In truth, many, many people can be successful — in different ways.

Solution: Learn to admire the success of others, and learn from it, and be happy for them, by empathizing with them and understanding what it must be like to be them. And then turn away from them, and look at yourself — you can be successful too, in whatever you choose to do. And even more, you already are successful. Look not at those above you in the social ladder, but those below you — there are always millions of people worse off than you, people who couldn’t even read this article or afford a computer. In that light, you are a huge success.

4. I am a miserable failure — I can’t seem to do anything right.

Problem: Everyone is a failure, if you look at it in certain ways. Everyone has failed, many times, at different things. I have certainly failed so many times I cannot count them — and I continue to fail, daily. However, looking at your failures as failures only makes you feel bad about yourself. By thinking in this way, we will have a negative self-image and never move on from here.

Solution: See your successes and ignore your failures. Look back on your life, in the last month, or year, or 5 years. And try to remember your successes. If you have trouble with this, start documenting them — keep a success journal, either in a notebook or online. Document your success each day, or each week. When you look back at what you’ve accomplished, over a year, you will be amazed. It’s an incredibly positive feeling.

5. I’m going to beat so-and-so no matter what — I’m better than him. And there’s no way I’ll help him succeed — he might beat me.

Problem: Competitiveness assumes that there is a small amount of gold to be had, and I need to get it before he does. It makes us into greedy, back-stabbing, hurtful people. We try to claw our way over people to get to success, because of our competitive feelings. For example, if a blogger wants to have more subscribers than another blogger, he may never link to or mention that other blogger. However, who is to say that my subscribers can’t also be yours? People can read and subscribe to more than one blog.

Solution: Learn to see success as something that can be shared, and learn that if we help each other out, we can each have a better chance to be successful. Two people working towards a common goal are better than two people trying to beat each other up to get to that goal. There is more than enough success to go around. Learn to think in terms of abundance rather than scarcity.

6. Dammit! Why do these bad things always happen to me?

Problem: Bad things happen to everybody. If we dwell on them, they will frustrate us and bring us down.

Solution: See bad things as a part of the ebb and flow of life. Suffering is a part of the human condition — but it passes. All pain goes away, eventually. Meanwhile, don’t let it hold you back. Don’t dwell on bad things, but look forward towards something good in your future. And learn to take the bad things in stride, and learn from them. Bad things are actually opportunities to grow and learn and get stronger, in disguise.

7. You can’t do anything right! Why can’t you be like ____ ?

Problem: This can be said to your child or your subordinate or your sibling. The problem? Comparing two people, first of all, is always a fallacy. People are different, with different ways of doing things, different strengths and weaknesses, different human characteristics. If we were all the same, we’d be robots. Second, saying negative things like this to another person never helps the situation. It might make you feel better, and more powerful, but in truth, it hurts your relationship, it will actually make you feel negative, and it will certainly make the other person feel negative and more likely to continue negative behavior. Everyone loses.

Solution: Take the mistakes or bad behavior of others as an opportunity to teach. Show them how to do something. Second, praise them for their positive behavior, and encourage their success. Last, and most important, love them for who they are, and celebrate their differences.

8. Your work sucks. It’s super lame. You are a moron and I hope you never reproduce.

Problem: I’ve actually gotten this comment before. It feels wonderful. However, let’s look at it not from the perspective of the person receiving this kind of comment but from the perspective of the person giving it. How does saying something negative like this help you? I guess it might feel good to vent if you feel like your time has been wasted. But really, how much of your time has been wasted? A few minutes? And whose fault is that? The bloggers or yours? In truth, making negative comments just keeps you in a negative mindset. It’s also not a good way to make friends.

Solution: Learn to offer constructive solutions, first of all. Instead of telling someone their blog sucks, or that a post is lame, offer some specific suggestions for improvement. Help them get better. If you are going to take the time to make a comment, make it worth your time. Second, learn to interact with people in a more positive way — it makes others feel good and it makes you feel better about yourself. And you can make some great friends this way. That’s a good thing.

9. Insulting People Back

Problem: If someone insults you or angers you in some way, insulting them back and continuing your anger only transfers their problem to you. This person was probably having a bad day (or a bad year) and took it out on you for some reason. If you reciprocate, you are now having a bad day too. His problem has become yours. Not only that, but the cycle of insults can get worse and worse until it results in violence or other negative consequences — for both of you.

Solution: Let the insults or negative comments of others slide off you like Teflon. Don’t let their problem become yours. In fact, try to understand their problem more — why would someone say something like that? What problems are they going through? Having a little empathy for someone not only makes you understand that their comment is not about you, but it can make you feel and act in a positive manner towards them — and make you feel better about yourself in the process.

10. I don’t think I can do this — I don’t have enough discipline. Maybe some other time.

Problem: If you don’t think you can do something, you probably won’t. Especially for the big stuff. Discipline has nothing to do with it — motivation and focus has everything to do with it. And if you put stuff off for “some other time”, you’ll never get it done. Negative thinking like this inhibits us from accomplishing anything.

Solution: Turn your thinking around: you can do this! You don’t need discipline. Find ways to make yourself a success at your goal. If you fail, learn from your mistakes, and try again. Instead of putting a goal off for later, start now. And focus on one goal at a time, putting all of your energy into it, and getting as much help from others as you can. You can really move mountains if you start with positive thinking.